This entry is prompted by an email I received regarding the 6/4/10 post which talked about being average & self-acceptance.
One of the person’s comments was: “You'd think by now I'd have learned to be average.”
As I read the sentence, the word that jumped out at me was ‘learned’. I don’t think that’s the way it works.
We learn that 2+2=4. We learn the ABC’s. We learn to read. We learn a different language. We learn how to use a computer, etc.
When I thought back, I don’t recall learning to be average. What I remember is learning new information, a new & better definition of average, then ‘accepting’ I was average. Maybe it’s all semantics, but I do think it makes a difference.
As with other concepts we learn throughout our lives, learning them-then knowing them is one thing. Using them is Step Two. In my opinion we must USE them – or else we make little or no progress.
Yes, and I still use “I am average”. Typically it’s when I’ve done something… well, let’s say, when I’ve done something unexpected. OK – it’s when I make a ‘mistake' - such as trip on a throw rug, or tip over a glass of water which sloshes over onto my computer keyboard.
The original response (and this IS what I have said out loud in a sarcastic tone of voice): “Well that was SMART, Rose.” And depending on the amount of damage, I may even throw in a: “That was REALLY smart, Rose!!”
So what comes next? OK–You guessed: yet another “I’m not wrong, I’m average”. I know I use that secure/realistic statement more than once a day – every day.
So why am I still practicing? Because. My mental health is my Supreme Goal. If I don’t, and I do know this to be the truth: then those trivial incidents, those trivial mistakes would pile up.
They’d pile up, and pile up, and pile up and pile up, and sooner or later they become ‘proof’ that something’s ‘wrong’ with me. I’d think I was un-average, below average. Tainted. Not as good as.
Nope – I don’t ‘go there’ anymore. My well-being, my inner-peace, is too precious.
Besides, I like feeling good, and I’d much rather be At Ease, and In Control.
PS: There’s more on the topic of self-acceptance. Saving that for next time.
PSS: A Big THANK YOU to the person who inspired me with their email.
As I’ve mentioned before, if I know something that’s helped me – I am certainly going to pass it along to others.
© 2010 Rose VanSickle ~ All rights reserved
