……… let me help you get that way
Last week I received one of those pass-along-emails, another one with an angry overtone. The title: NEVER FORGIVE A TRAITOR (yes, in all caps). It contained information about Jane Fonda and an incident which happened more than 40 years ago.
Here are the first two sentences of the note: "For those of you too young to remember Hanoi Jane is a bad person and did some terrible things during the Vietnam war. Things that can not be forgiven!!!!!!”
Dredging up temper – the judgement of ‘someone is wrong’ and passing it along to dozens and dozens of people is, in my mind, not being group-minded, not being group-minded at all.
It’s not healthy for the sender. Think about it: that person is riled up enough to pass it along. And most probably it’s not all that good for the receiver either – if the receiver is going to get upset about it.
Sender’s motive?? This makes me angry, I hope it makes you angry too. I hope you’re on my side about this one.
Who knows? Perhaps it’s a simple: I think you ought to know about this.
My thoughts: Remember, temper -- the judgement that someone or something is wrong – causes tension, and tension causes symptoms. The event could be current, or from long ago – but the response is now – the thoughts are in the present.
Actually, sometimes recalling a past injustice can be good – but only if the person thinking about it decides to once-and-for-all, to finally drop the judgment. We drop the judgment, we neutralize the temper, not for the other person’s sake – but for our own.
Reminder: It’s not people, places, things, events, or emails that give us our upset, our symptoms. It is our response to those things which makes us cranky, crabby, out-of-sorts, tense, depressed, etc.
If, and that’s a big IF, if you can read words that label someone wrong, Wrong, WRONG and remain neutral or indifferent -- good for you. But the vast majority of people would, and do have negative responses. They get mad, even worse – they stay mad.
Now, what would you rather be known as: Someone who provokes anger/bad feelings, or someone who consciously chooses to be an uplifter -- someone who spreads joy and goodwill
The choice is ours – Always!
My Rule: If what I just read doesn’t feel good to me, there’s no way I’m going to pass it along.
My hope, my desire, is to have someone feel good or better after they’ve interacted with me – whether it’s through email, by phone or in-person.
I choose to be uplifting, not depressing! How about you?
Spread joy, not misery.
© 2011 Rose VanSickle ~ All rights reserved